The Insoluble Dilemma Of Society’s Pressure

When mothers experience the joy of their first born they are bombarded with endless advices from families. When I was expecting Liyana, I thoroughly read articles on how to take care of a new born; innumerable videos showcasing guidelines for a newborn’s daily care. Which resulted in midwives suspecting if she truly was my first born. From changing her first nappy to her first steps, I can proudly say I did everything according to my motherly instincts. A mother shares a remarkable bond with her child which makes her familiar with her needs more effectively than anyone else.

The adoration and fondness spread by families and friends for a newborn is heartwarming, except when their constant advices grow into judgements. Bodies of postnatal mothers are exhausted and drained, it takes great deal of time to regain their former state of mind. Their fragile state of mind should be supported and taken care of with affection and love.

Babies are little humans, just like adults each and every baby is unique from one another. Their metabolism and growth span varies too. When Liyana was an infant I endured constant pressure of making her sleep all night. I was persistently told to add cereal in her milk, or force her not to sleep in the evening. Babies have their own terms, so did she. My intuitions never made me add cereal in her bottles until I knew she was ready. She NEVER slept in her cot, the rhythm of my heartbeat made her go to sleep everynight. I made every possible effort to keep her in cot; placing my shirt beside her was one of them. When I realised no amount of effort could implement her pattern of sleep I gleefully shared my bed with her. And I have not regretted for once. I took matters in my own hands, instead of worrying about others opinions.

Eventually, she started sleeping all through the night. And without any dire need of cereals, she happily started weaning at five and a half months; banana puree became her first solid food.